


The Man in the Tan Trenchcoat

by Taco_Fapper



Category: Supernatural, Welcome to Night Vale
Genre: Bottom Cecil, Bottom Dean, M/M, Top Castiel, Top Sam, Typical Night Vale Weirdness, Unless you want it to be, but not a big deal, but that's not really the point, idk - Freeform, occasional cussing
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-03-02
Updated: 2017-11-05
Packaged: 2018-09-27 22:17:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 11
Words: 11,435
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10053977
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Taco_Fapper/pseuds/Taco_Fapper
Summary: Two men. Both tall, both strong.Two men. Looking for someone gone.Two men. One with hair so fair.Two men. One definitely NOT an angel.Welcome to Night Vale, Supernatural.I'd like to put here that I'm not explicitly stating what race/ethnicity Cecil is. He can be whatever you imagine him to be. I just like the headcanon of his tattoos.





	1. Strangers In Town

"Why does the screaming sunrise glow purple and red?" Cecil said, throwing his voice into a deep baritone. "Why does the quiet dusk creep in, with colours of pink and yellow? Why does my toast taste so very stale? Welcome to Night Vale."

Cecil leaned back, almost tipping his chair over in the process. He tried to grab onto the desk but just managed to further knock himself off-balance, crashing into the floor. The music began to end and he scrambled to sit up, managing to get to his mic just in time for brocasting to begin.

"Listeners, today two strangers have literally appeared in Night Vale. One second they were definitely not here and yet the next second they were. One was wearing a long, tan trenchcoat with nearly-perfect-as-carlos's hair and electric blue eyes. The other had strange, candy apple green eyes and what I counted to be five layers of clothes. Five!" Cecil couldn't help but squeal with excitement. He had never met anyone with more than two layers of clothing!

Cecil moved on with his broadcast, stating the Community Calendar, a warning to watch out for zom-bees, ignore any stray boots in your home and to definitely,  _definitely_ not scare off the newcomers. He mentioned John Peters, you know, the farmer and his invisible corn prices. He mentioned the Erikas and their increasing numbers but mostly he just tried to convey the message the the citizens of Night Vale were not to attack, scorn, or otherwise unneccesarily bother the newcomers. Just as Cecil was about to hand the mic to Deb (the sentient patch of haze) for the sponsors; a resounding, near feral growl resounded from the bloodstone circle within his booth. "Ohhhhh listeners, I think I might have guests! I know it isn't Carlos, you know, my husband, cause he said he would be at the lab all day. Maybe it's the two strangers! I'll go greet them and take you to a message from our sponsors."

Cecil nearly ran from the booth in his excitement to get to the pair of strangers. He slowed his roll just enough not to run into them but still managed to end up just outside of too close for comfort. Cecil beamed at the two men. The nearly-perfect-as-carlos's hair one looked at him strangely while the five-layers-of-clothing man just gaped. "Hello! My name is Cecil. I'm the radio host here at Night Vale Community Radio. It's nice to meet you! I don't know if you heard my broadcast but I'm super excited to meet you. It's been awhile since we've had friendly new people. Why are you here?"

"Uhhhhhh" Was all the five-layered man said. He was still gaping. Cecil frowned and looked down at himself. He didn't spill his coffee did he? It did happen often but he doesn't remeber it happening today. His pale purple suit vest was free of stains as were his jeans. His silver and dark purple tattoos moved around but that was normal when he's excited, so pretty much all the time they moved. Maybe the newcomer hadn't seen moving tattoos. As far as Cecil knew, he was the only one with them. Just as he was going to say something, the blue-eyed man opened his mouth. "Hello," He said. "My name is Castiel and this is Dean. We're here looking for his brother, Sam. Do you know where he might be? He's roughly 6'4" and had brown hair." His voice was low and soothing but held hidden power. Cecil decided he liked him immediately. 

"I don't know about any Sam but who told you he was here? Was it the Sheriff's Secret police or maybe the lights above the Arby's? Or maybe it was Station Management? They do tend to steal people from time to time. Mostly I'm pretty sure they're fine afterwards even if they tend to come out missing a finger or maybe a snip of hair." Cecil smiled and babbled trying to catch Dean's eyes.

"I don't know anything about a Sheriff's Secret Police but Sam's been missing for about two months. I sensed him here and Dean wanted to come along. I tried to keep him at the bunker but he insisted." Castiel responded, shooting a glare at Dean.

Dean blushed, furrowed his brows, and glanced away embarrassedly. "What kind of set up is this? Is that blood?" Dean asked, taking in the decor.

"Of course not!" Cecil laughed. "It's just paint. Station Management does that too sometimes. They're sigils to keep the giant worms out along with any hooded figures."

Dean gaped again. "Sorry, sorry. I forget how strange Night Vale seems to newcomers. Maybe you can check in with Carlos, my husband. He's from outside of Night Vale too!" Cecil rushed to say, trying to put the man at ease.

"Oh. That would be....nice. Where could we find Carlos?" Castiel asks, after a pause.

"You can find Carlos in his lab of course! He is a scientist after all." Cecil beamed, tattoos wriggling happily up and down his bare arms at the mention of his husband.

Castiel and Dean stared for a moment more before asking for directions. Cecil gave them, practically bouncing with how happy he was. The strange, well strange for Night Vale, duo left and Cecil went back to his booth. Cecil grinned at the mic, whatever was going on was going to be an adventure of epic proportions and he'll be damned if he doesn't report the story.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi, so this is like my first fanfic ever. It'll be probably trash but hopefully regular updates. Tell me if you like it!


	2. Scientist of the Highest Degree

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dean and Cas hit up the local scientist.

Dean and Cas exited the strange radio tower, more confused than when they walked in. At least now they had a plan. Get to the scientist. Hopefully he could help them.

Dean blinked in the bright desert sun and sighed. He missed his brother. How could he not? After everything they had lived through (well after dying), being away from Sammy for more than month was a bit like the first week of rehab. Terrible and you wanted to die.

Dean glanced over at Cas, smiling when Cas glanced back. The blue-eyed angel was a sight to behold in a desert. The relentless sun made his eyes sparkle and made his dark hair look positively obsidian. Everyone knew Cas loved Dean but not many knew how much Dean loved Cas back. Not even Cas. Sammy, of course, knew. Dean would never keep that from his brother.

Dean frowned when he caught a dark movement out of the corner of his eye. It looked like a dark figure with huge, black wings was hiding behind a tree. When Dean turned to look at it fully, nothing was there. “What is it, Dean?” Cas asked, turning to follow Dean’s gaze.

“It’s nothing. I thought I saw something. Must’ve been a shadow.” Dean replied.

“This town gives me the creeps.” Dean continued. “Like that Cecil guy. He was wearing pink crocs. Who the hell wears crocs? He didn’t even have a shirt on. Just that stupid suit vest. And don’t even get me started on the guy we passed on the way here. And those tattoos. How the hell did they move?”

By the time Dean finished his grumbled, yet still loud, rant; the duo had managed to get their way to Big Rico’s, which was right next to Carlos’s lab. Or at least they hoped so and that Cecil didn’t send them on some bizarre goose chase.

They walked the rest of the way to Carlos’s lab and rang the doorbell. Or what they thought was a doorbell. It had a little button and was shaped mostly like a doorbell so they just assumed. It made a large **bong** and a few seconds later the door opened. A man stepped out, hair pulled up in a loose bun and dark skin glowing. “Hello Castiel and Dean! Cecil said, well more like announced, you were coming. Come in, come in. Ignore the science.” The man, presumably Carlos said.

Dean sighed in relief, Carlos seemed normal. He walked in first, glancing in interest at the multitude of whiteboards and science equipment scattered all over. He followed Carlos into a back room, which turned out to be an office. Full of papers and filing cabinets the office looked perfectly normal.

“So, I know Night Vale may seem like much but it’s really not that bad.” Carlos began, moving a broken clock off a chair for his guests to sit in.

Dean took the seat gratefully while Castiel declined. “What’s up with your husband, Cecil?” Dean blurted, tact failing him, a usual occurrence.

Carlos just smiled. “Cecil is wonderful. Sure he’s got his moving tattoos, his strange kink for my hair, his third-” Here Carlos stopped and looked away guiltily.

“His third what?” Castiel asked, head cocking to the side.

“Nothing. It’s not mine to tell. Cecil doesn’t like others knowing. Now, why are you here?” Carlos responded, quickly changing the subject.

“My brother. I need to find him.” Dean said, hoping this man would be able to help.

“Your brother? What does he look like?” Carlos asked, intrigued.

“Tall, longish hair, smart, unable to have sex without the girl dying.” Dean responded.

“Hmmm, I don’t know. No matter how this town may seem, it’s actually pretty big. Do you know why he might be here? It might help.” Carlos responded, moving to find a pencil and notebook, Dean presumed.

“No, I have no clue. He just disappeared one day about two months ago.” Dean responded, looking confused as Carlos pulled out a crayon instead of a pencil.

“Why are you writing with a crayon? And what are you writing?” Dean asked and Carlos started scribbling away on a piece of cardboard.

Carlos barely looked up as he replied, “We’re not allowed to write with pens or pencils and the cardboard is so the Erikas will help.”

Dean and Castiel just shared a glance. ‘Yep this guy is crazy as well.’ Before they could leave, Carlos finished writing and got up.

“Follow me. The Erikas are great at tracking people.”

Dean muttered a quiet ‘fuck it’ and Castiel just followed along silently.

Carlos took them over to a house near an old used car lot and knocked on the door. It creaked open and a tall, dark, winged figure peered out. It seemed to brighten after seeing Carlos and opened the door in invitation.

Carlos smiled at the figure and stepped into the house. Dean followed carefully but when Cas tried to follow he stopped at the threshold, facing scrunching up in displeasure. Just as Dean was about to ask what was wrong, Castiel spoke. “Dean, I am afraid I cannot step inside. There is warding here. Strong warding. It’s almost as if- no he died. Go on without me.”

“Cas, come on man. I’m not gonna leave you out here for who knows how long.”

“Dean, you must go with Carlos. I’ll be fine.” Cas responded, leveling an intense glare at Dean.

Dean stared back. He didn’t want to leave Cas. Hell, he couldn’t. Luckily Carlos stepped in.

“Cas, is it okay if I call you that, Cas? Why can’t you come in?” He asked, completely missing the conversation that just took place.

“This house. It is warded against angels.” At this an alarm sounded. Dean and Cas looked around confused and alarmed.

“Oh no, you can’t admit the existence of angels. You have to take it back.” Carlos said hurriedly, looking almost pained.

“But why? I am an Angel of the Lord. Angels exist and I know they exist for I am one. Why would I lie and say they do not?” Cas asked, confused. The alarms got louder.

“He did not mean it. He is new. Do not punish him.” Carlos said loudly, seemingly to no one. The alarms stopped. “Look, Cas. Since you are a non-angel and can’t come in why don’t you find a place for you and Dean to stay. You two will probably be here overnight.”

“But I am an an-” Cas started.

“NO you’re not.” Carlos said, staring at Cas and pleading for him to get the idea. Cas did not but decided to just give up and play along.

“There’s a hotel near the Desert Flower Bowling Alley and Arcade Fun Complex. You can check in there. It’s always nearly empty because no one can really find Night Vale. Only people there is that one Erika that is always leaving and coming back. He keeps insisting his name is Gabriel not Erika but other than that he should leave you alone. Deb is there too sometimes, along with Dr. Sarah Sultan but neither of them should bother you.”

“Yeah, just go Cas. I’ll be fine….I think.” Dean said, just giving up on the whole bizarre day.

Cas just nodded and disappeared, much to the surprise of Carlos.

“He-he just disappeared! Does he do that often? How far is his range? How does he do it?” Carlos asked Dean excitedly.

“He’s an A-N-G-E-L. All of them can do that.” Dean said, spelling out angel so the alarms wouldn’t go off again.

Carlos nodded excitedly and went deeper into the house, cardboard clutched in his left hand. Dean followed warily, bow-legs not shaking but close to it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey so I'll probably update on thursdays but I felt like I just had to get the second chapter out.


	3. The Erikas

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow, I did this late. I totally forgot that I had to update today. Lmao.

Dean stood impatiently to the side as Carlos conversed with the winged creatures, observing and unnerved. They didn’t talk but instead drew really, and I mean really, bad pictures on the cardboard.

Carlos glanced back at the man and attempted to shoot a reassuring smile. It didn’t work. Dean was too focused on the Erikas, who were now drawing a moose with golden wings. Carlos scratched his head.  _ What does this mean? Dean’s brother was kidnapped by some strange moose-bird hybrid? No, that would be ridiculous. But it is Night Vale. Maybe Ceec could help.  _

Carlos bid the Erikas good-bye and motioned for Dean to follow him. Instead, Dean walked towards the tallest Erika and stared at it.

Carlos didn’t dare breathe. The Erikas didn’t like challenges and Dean was most definitely challenging it. Hopefully Dean’s death would be quick, mused Carlos. Carlos was fully prepared for Dean’s death so when the Erika stared back and then smiled Carlos nearly fainted.

He had never seen an Erika smile. It should have been grotesque or maybe just weird but instead it was warm. Like a hug. Or a summer day that had been long forgotten.

Dean gave a small smile back and walked out as Carlos tried to wrap his head around what just happened.

Carlos followed Dean outside into the dry heat and directed Dean to go the motel. Carlos wasn’t sure what was going on but the Erikas told, well drew, him where to go. And the motel was it or at least he thought. They really were terrible artists.

Carlos shook his hair out the instant Dean, Cas, and him were all in the motel room number 69. Not like there even were 69 rooms. There were only about 15 but none of the numbers were even close to correct. One was even 221. Like why? Carlos had long given up on understanding parts of Night Vale but its inhabitants would never stop fascinating him. For once though, he wasn’t concentrating on the hooded figure or the smooth river rock or even the Erika with the dark golden hair and whiskey eyes in the lobby.

No, he was more concerned with Dean and Cas. And their obvious pining for each other. It must of been like the days before Cecil and him were together. Gosh, that seems so long ago. Carlos wondered if Ceec and him could come up with a plan to get the two together. But first they had to find Dean’s brother.

“So, what’d the Erikas tell us?” Dean asked, flopping onto a bed.

Cas’s eyes follow the line of skin from Dean’s shirt riding up. Carlos cleared his throat. “Well you see...it’s not that simple. They don’t really tell you anything directly. Like ever. Except, I guess, to people they really, really like. Other than that, you sort of have to figure it out. They like riddles and games. So, I may not exactly be right but-”

“Just spit it out man! Stop trying to stall.” Dean interjected.

“Look,” Here Carlos took a deep breath, “yourbrotherwasn’ttaken. He came here of his own free will and so the Erikas can’t track him. They got as far as the motel and then lose him. I’m sorry. I don’t know what else to tell you.”

Dean gaped. It seemed he was doing a lot of gaping these days. “Th-that’s bullshit! My brother would never leave without telling me. Especially if we didn’t have an argument beforehand. That’s just dumb! That’s insane! Someone please tell me this is a joke. Please.” Dean pleaded.

“The dark-skinned man is not lying Dean. His body reads like he is speaking the truth.” Cas said, resting a light hand on Dean’s shoulder.

“Oh, like that’s supposed to make me feel better, Cas!” Dean snaps and then looks immediately guilty. “Sorry buddy, I’m just strung out.”

“Ummm look. I know you think Cecil is weird but what if we go back to the radio station and ask him? Maybe he can help. He usually knows what’s going on.” Carlos offered, trying to help Dean.

“Nah we already asked him. He said to ask you. And you said to ask the Erikas. And the Erikas lead us here. It’s just one big crappy chase.” Dean said, growing more agitated with each sentence.

Suddenly a knock came from the door. “Helloooo, housekeeping.”

Carlos opened the door. You don’t ignore housekeeping in Night Vale. However, what came through the door wasn’t a horrifying, dripping mess of undefinable substances that smelled of cotton candy and salt water. It wasn’t even scary. Therefore it wasn’t housekeeping. But both Dean and Cas paled.

“I have the kielbasa you ordered.” The figure/man/Erika said in the doorway, lips pulled into a smirk.

“Gab-gabriel? But you died?” Cas breathed, almost sounding awed? No, that isn’t the right word. Maybe shocked/relieved. Yeah, Cas sounded shocked and relieved in equal amounts.


	4. Gabriel. Surprisingly not an Erika

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Gabriel isn't really helpful at all. But it's not exactly his fault. He was going to help. Honestly. He just gets interrupted.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow so this is getting updated almost three days late. I didn't even get a change to write until now so I haven't even looked over it. Hope you enjoy it!

“Hey Cassie boy. Did ya miss me?” Gabriel asked, sauntering into the room.  
“What the hell. What the ever loving hell. You died. Sam and I saw your body. Lucifer killed you.” Dean said, flabbergasted.   
“Yeah, well death didn’t exactly stick for me. It was rather boring.” Gabriel smirked. Castiel looked uncertain. Dean looked a little mad. Carlos looked confused.  
“I’m sorry but what is going on?” Carlos asked. He didn’t understand anything and after living in Night Vale he thought things would stop surprising him. But this? This was just absurd. The Erika or he guesses its name is actually Gabriel, knew Dean and Cas. Which didn’t make sense. One, because the Erikas only seem to exist inside of Night Vale. Second, the non-angels didn’t make friends, other than Old Woman Josie. Third, what Erika talked?!   
But, Carlos was nothing but a scientist and the evidence showed that maybe Gabriel was not an Erika but maybe the same breed of non-angel as Castiel.  
“Well, Cassie here and I are some of the first creations by God. We have wings and super magical powers.” Gabriel responded, taking a lollipop out of his jacket pocket.  
“I understand that much. But, how do you know each other? Why did you show up to this room?” Carlos asked.  
“Yeah, why are you here Gabriel?” Dean asked, glaring at the golden haired angel.  
“Look Carlos. This whole thing is more between the Ken doll and Mr. I’m in love with the Righteous Man so you might want to leave.” Gabriel responded, smirking around the lollipop.  
“No way, Gabriel. Carlos helped us get here so he’s staying.” Dean said, surprising everyone in the room.  
“Oooh someone is touchy. But fineeee.” Gabriel said, “Now to answer your questions. I’m here because I know where Sammy is. I know Cassie for way back but we’ll not get into that. I know Deano here from sacrificing myself about five or six years ago. Not, that it did much good. Lucifer was always an ass and Dad always just brought me back everytime I died.”  
“You know where Sam is?” Dean asked.  
“What are talking about? I don’t remember you from before pulling Dean out of hell?” Castiel also asked.  
“Who do you mean by Dad?” Carlos asked at the same time as the other two.  
“Look I know you're all desperate but hold your horses.” Gabriel said, holding both hands up in a warding off gesture.  
“I-”   
At that moment, screaming started. And not the screaming of the sunset. No, this was too high pitched. Too eerie. Too haunting. Too- just too strange. It sent chills into everyone in the room.  
“What was that?” Dean asked, gripping and pulling out his gun.  
Carlos looked nervous, even scared.  
Castiel and Gabriel both vanished.  
“What the hell! CAS! Where’d you go?” Dean yelled.  
“Dean we have to go find Cecil.” Carlos said urgently, moving towards the hotel door.  
“No way. We’re not going just so you can go check up on you weirdo husband.” Dean, said voice rising in what Carlos recognized as panic.   
Even with recognizing Dean’s panic, hearing his husband insulted pissed Carlos off. “Look. Dean. My husband might be a little strange but you don’t know anything about him so shut the fuck up. We need to find him and find him NOW. The last time I heard that scream, I almost died, he almost murdered everyone in Night Vale, and Station Management came out of their office. So this is more than me just being worried about my husband.” Carlos nearly snarled at Dean.  
Dean was shocked in submissive silence. “Sorry.” He replied meekly, “Show the way.”  
“Thank you.” Carlos responded, relaxing slightly, “Now, we have to go carefully. Cecil is probably the most dangerous thing in this town when angered. I don’t know what angered him but it’s gonna take a lot to calm him down. We need to either find him or get back to my lab.”  
“Why don’t we go back to your lab and maybe listen to the radio to see what’s going on?” Dean suggested.  
“That...that’s actually not a bad idea. My lab automatically records all broadcasts that Cecil does. I can replay them and find out what triggered Cecil into this state.” Carlos opened the door the hotel room and stepped out with Dean close behind. Night Vale had drastically changed.   
Instead of a bright desert day; the sky was a dark purple with streaks of neon green. It was almost cold and every, single, electrical light was out. Wind howled through the streets, knocking over plants, small children, and hooded figures.  
“We’ve gotta go quick. This is worse than last time.” Carlos said, starting to sprint across the road.  
Dean followed close behind and the two managed to see Big Rico’s sign in the near distance before the ground around them started to shake. The two fell the the ground, desperately trying not to tumble all over the place.  
Another eerie scream pierced the air, sounding almost directly behind them. Dean and Carlos turned around, facing the source of the scream. Dean looked shocked and every, drop of blood drained from Carlos’s face. For, behind them, floating several feet above the ground, was Cecil.


	5. Cecil

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dean shoots a gun. Carlos runs around and give orders.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let me know what you think!

It was cold. 

That was Dean’s first thought. 

Cecil’s gaze was cold. It held no warmth, no spark, no  _ thing _ that made it human. Just the gaze of a hunter on its prey. Cecil’s tattoos were no longer things of wonder and wriggling glee. No, they were dark stains on flesh that seared and stung with every glance thrown at them.

Dean didn’t like it to say the least. He didn’t have his baby brother, his angel was missing, and now; suddenly, this god, awful, crazy, fucked-up town had a rampaging radio host. He was tired, he was scared, and he just wanted to give up. 

But, Dean was never one to give up. Not when Lucifer possessed his brother, not when the freaking apocalypse took his brother, not when he died (more times than he could count admittedly), and not even when he had to fight God’s sister. So he immediately thought of a plan. And that plan was to run. Run far away, regroup, form a better plan, and get Sammy.

Unfortunately, Carlos had a different plan for the two of them. Carlos started taking careful, steady steps towards Cecil’s dark, hovering frame. “Cecil, honey.” He called, “You still in there? I know you’re mad but, I’m sure it’s nothing to warrant this.”

Cecil merely cocked his head, looking down at Carlos. Dean gulped. Cecil’s gaze was no longer cold. It was a burning fire that threatened to burn everyone and everything at the slightest hint of provocation.

“Carlos, I think you might want to step back. I’ll see if I can draw him of with some gunshots.” Dean said, regaining control as best he could over the situation.

Carlos looked horrified. Dean, misreading the situation, thought that Carlos thought Dean was intending on shooting Cecil. Dean rolled his eyes. “Dude, I promise I won’t shoot your husband, just get back.”

Dean drew his pistol and checked for bullets. He only had three. He slid the safety off and started to aim to the left of Cecil, back towards the radio station. Cecil merely stared from his spot a few feet off the ground, wind none too gently whipping through his hair. Honestly, the lack of animation from the seemingly energetic man from before was creeping Dean out more than he liked to admit. Not that he would admit much. Dean took the shot. Cecil’s head whipped towards the bullet and then whipped back when Carlos, too late, screamed no.

Cecil  _ glowered _ , tattoos raising off his skin in dark streaks and coalescing into dark masses around him. He moved forward and down, his feet hitting the pavement and his presence quickly bearing down on Dean. “Dean we have to run. God, I was hoping to not do this but we’re gonna have to sedate him until he calms down.” Carlos murmured.

Dean turned and ran.

* * *

 

Dean shoved the heavy lab door closed while Carlos moved quickly and started rummaging through science supplies. Thankfully the two of them had been close enough to the lab to run quickly into it. 

Cecil pounded on the door, the hits louder than what should be possible. The door groaned under the force but held steadfast. Dean moved away and tried to understand what Carlos was looking for. Honestly, it looked like Carlos was looking for anything. Dean wasn’t a scientist and therefore he had no clue what was going on. 

Thunder rolled and Carlos looked up with a grimace on his perfect face. “Crap. Dean, I’m going to need more of your help.” Carlos said, throwing open a chest dramatically.

“Sure, whatever you need.” Dean replied, eyeing the chest warily. The thing was glowing and looked radioactive.

“I need to you go the radio tower and grab station management.”

“What?” 

“I need you to grab them. They have powers that can help. I’m going to grab the secret police and maybe city council.” Carlos rushed around the room, grabbing a lab coat, stuffing vials and needles and other sciency things into the deep pockets.

“Um okay, so what do I say to station management.  A ‘Hey you don’t know me but like come with me if you want to live.’ sort of thing or what?” Dean snorted.

“Just go into the building and sing a song. They’ll understand. Now hurry!” Carlos pushed Dean out the door and into a blinding rain. Cecil was no longer lurking around and Dean took off in a fast sprint towards the radio tower on its hill (not mountain).

He got to the radio tower without incident. The rain was biting, literally. Each raindrop that hit Dean’s exposed flesh left tiny bite marks on his flesh. The radio tower’s doors were slammed wide open and Dean hurried inside. He needed to find station management soon. Dean looked around but everything seemed empty and abandoned. What was it that he needed to do anyway?

Right sing a song. Well, the only songs he knew were hard to concentrate on with the constant thunder and rain. Then, a song came to the back of his mind. A lost memory, one before he had to grow up far too fast. Dean began to sing.

_ Hey Jude, don't make it bad _

_ Take a sad song and make it better _

_ Remember to let her into your heart _

_ Then you can start to make it better _

A low, non threatening growl resonated through Dean’s body and he tensed up. Hopefully it was station management. It was. Their dark, terrifying,  _ mass _ of a body moved surprisingly graceful through the halls and towards Dean. Dean let loose a nervous smile. “Hey, so, like, we need to get this show on the road. Cecil’s gone insane, or I guess more insane and his husband said to get you.” Dean said, nerves making him trip over some of the words.

Station management let off a noise that Dean  _ hoped _ was a laugh and the bizarre duo moved into the rain.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Carlos mixes stuff to knock Cecil out and Dean gets triggered.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow, super sorry for the late update. But hey, I'll update tomorrow to make up for it. :)

Carlos started mixing chemicals together. He needed a fast acting sedative and he needed it yesterday. Cecil wasn’t going to calm down; not with his strange tentacle appendages out and about. Carlos also turned on his recording of today’s broadcast, trying to multi-task. Cecil’s calm, deep, radio voice pours out of the speakers; his voice a honey velvet, his words far too frightening for the calmness he exudes. “Listeners, I’m not going to lie to you. I’ve been struggling the past couple of days,” Carlos ears perk up (not literally, although for Night Vale it was quite common). “I feel like something is wrong with the town. People have stopped dying in droves. My current intern, Mira, has been with us for a whole month! Most interns have only lasted a week or two! The Glow Cloud, all hail, hasn’t forced mandatory hailing in two months and City Council hasn’t gone on any pre-planned vacations in almost three. I don’t like it. Don’t get me wrong, people living is good and I like the calmness but last time this happened... Oh listeners, last time this happened, I almost killed everyone. I don’t want that to happen again. I love my town. I love you. I love my beautiful Carlos. I love the lights above the Arby’s. I even love our newcomers. I don’t want to hurt any of you. Even Steve Carlsburg. So listeners, I am afraid. I don’t want to be. I have no reason to be but here I am, still afraid.” 

Carlos frowned, adding a bit more chloroform to his solution. Cecil rarely expressed fears (his real fears, not ones that he was told to say) on air. Not only was it rare, it also meant Cecil knew something was going to happen. Cecil was a tad clairvoyant like that. He could sense things that were going to pass but not what. Usually a feeling of unease or happiness. It was a rare gift and even rarer still was that Cecil never tried to stop it. Oh, he could; if he really wanted to. It’s just that Cecil thought it was wrong to. ‘Carlos, it’s not my place.” He would say, “Just because I can sense it doesn’t mean I should stop it. That’s not my job. Anyway, most of the things that happen is beneficial to the community.’ 

Carlos snorts at the memory. Cecil could be so clever at times and so stupid at others. Carlos still hasn’t decided which one that quote would be. Carlos moves around, checking the solution’s weight and colour. He deems it perfect for knocking Cecil out cold and pours it carefully into a small vial/bottle. Just as he finished pocket the mixture, a booming crash shook the lab. Carlos guessed Dean had gotten Station Management to help. Neat.

“Carlos, you ready?” Dean called, jogging into the lab, Station Management close behind.

“Yeah. I’ve got the knockout drug ready; we just need to find a way to administer it. It’ll probably be best through a tranq or something since that is ultimately what we’re trying to do.” Carlos explained.

Station Management glided over. It reached a shadowy mass out, much like a hand. “Give it.” Station Management said, voice grating.

Carlos quickly handed it over, in fear of the strange mass. “Thanks.” It said and proceeded to leave the lab, leaving a dumbstruck Caros and Dean behind. 

  
“Well, that was new.” Carlos breathed, “Here’s hoping they actually use it and use it well.”

“Yeah but why-” Dean was cut off by a loud growl from outside.

Crashes and booms came from all around and the lab shook. The lights flickered in and out and bits of science equipment slid around. “Aw come on! This is like a bad horror movie!” Dean yelled as a microscope slid off a table and onto the floor.

As if in response to Dean’s indignation, the horror movie cliches stopped. The two men looked at each other and decided to risk going outside. They moved forward cautiously and slowly opened the lab’s front door. They were greeted with a strange sight. Cecil was curled up on the sidewalk in front of the door and Station Management was making out (or it sure looked like it) with City Council. “Okay, that’s enough of this shit! I’m done with this town! Sammy can go fuck himself.” And with that loud exclamation, Dean stomped off.

Or at least he tried to. He promptly tripped of Cecil and cursed loudly. Cecil didn’t move. Dean huffed and started to move down the sidewalk. “Dean, I know you want to leave but could you at least bring Cecil inside with me. He’s a bit heavy for me.” Carlos said calmly.

Dean ran a hand through his hair and sighed. “Yeah, sure whatever.”

The two maneuvered Cecil carefully into the lab and placed his carefully onto a long, low table off to the side. Cecil’s tattoos were no longer a dark purple but instead were a muted lavender. Dean didn’t know what that meant. Carlos knew but didn’t want to tell. Cecil breathed steadily.

Carlos, placed a light hand on Dean’s forearm. Not too heavy and not too light, the weight was a steady reassurance and a quiet plea. A plea to stay until everything was alright. 

Dean sighed. He really didn’t want to stay but his earlier anger was diminishing. Carlos was a cool dude in his books and Castiel was AWOL; what harm was there in staying for a little longer? 

Dean didn’t actually want to think too long on that question. He murmured a quiet yes to Carlos and quietly backed away when Carlos started threading through his husbands’ wild hair. Carlos started muttering to Cecil and that’s when Dean started uncomfortably looking away. He had never dealt with PDA well and it was made worse with the fact that Carlos obviously loved Cecil. Dean was just about to leave the lab altogether and go to Big Rico’s when a flutter of wings sounded throughout the room. “Hello Dean.” Castiel said and then was promptly flattened by Gabriel appearing right on top of him.


	7. Confusion and Reassurances

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hey Cecil has a sixith toe. I don't even know anymore. This story is falling apart faster than my life.

Needless to say, there was a lot of confusion. If you put an archangel, an angel, an unconscious man, and two conscious men in a single room; in a place like Night Vale, you get strange results. And those results were currently developing. 

A lot of curses. That was from Dean. A lot of apologizing. That was from Gabriel. A lot of groaning. That was Castiel. Carlos was just staring and questioning. Even after years in Night Vale, things still managed to surprise him. And this was one such instance.

After some time, everyone managed to pull themselves together. Castiel ended up in a huff next to Dean while Gabriel stood guiltily (but not too guilty) a couple of feet away. Carlos turned back to Cecil and was pleased to note that Cecil’s tattoo colour was improving. It was darkening, signalling Cecil’s return to awareness. “Dean, I need you to grab a water bottle and some food. There should be some in that cabinet over there.” Carlos said, vaguely pointing behind him.

Dean jumped to follow his orders. Cas was still disgruntled at Gabriel’s rather  _ harsh _ landing and a grumpy Cas wasn’t a fun Cas.  

Dean rifled through a cabinet; finding a small bottle of what certainly  _ looked  _ like water and a pack of gummies. He handed them over to Carlos who was holding Cecil’s hand. “Thanks. I guess you guys can just sit tight while Cecil recovers. You can ask Gabriel about your brother.” Carlos suggested.

Dean turned to Gabriel immediately. “Yeah, now all that scary business is out of the way, maybe you can tell us what happened to Sammy.” 

Gabriel sighed. “Dean, I don’t want to talk about it but I guess I’ll have to.” Gabriel took a big breath. “Sam is here because I’m here. I guess you could say we’re together. Although it’s fairly uncommon for angels to be in...relationships with humans; it’s not altogether impossible.” Gabriel gives a pointed glance at both Dean and Castiel that Dean chose to ignore and Castiel didn’t understand. Gabriel continued unperturbed. “I felt the need to...escape for a while if you will. Dad isn’t exactly the best parent and when he’s forced you to basically live with him, it gets pretty old fast. I just needed to get away. And Night Vale is the perfect place for that. Only place in the universe that Dad can’t get to.” Gabriel said smugly.

“What do you mean?” Castiel asked, confused. Dean was still trying to grasp that his brother was fucking an angel.

“Cassie, come on. Night Vale was what us Archangels were given free rein of in the beginning. Most of the crazy stuff here is because of Luci and Michael’s little ‘squabbles’. And since Dad gave us free rein, we put wards up to keep him out. Took the whole lot of us too. Dad was-is- strong.”

“I’m totally lost.” Carlos interjected.

“Welcome to the club.” Muttered Dean. His brother, his little baby brother was having a  _ thing _ with an angel. Not any angel but an archangel. And not any archangel. Gabriel. The trickster, the pranker, the one who convinced others he was Loki or he was dead.

“C-Carlos?” A confused voice came from Cecil.

Carlos immediately turned back and soothingly ran his hands over Cecil’s face. “Hey baby. Welcome back.”

“What happened?” Cecil asked, trying to sit up. The sedative was still in his system so he couldn’t do much more than struggle for a second and then lay limp.

“You sort of had another episode.” Carlos said, his voice and actions soothing.

“No, no, no, no, NO! Not again! Carlos, why does this happen?” Cecil almost wailed, his tattoo pulsing colours in his distress.

“Honey I don’t know but we’ll figure it out. I’LL figure it out. I am a scientist after all and a scientist finds an answer to everything.” With that Carlos turned back to the other three, “Are any of you good with science or at least basic anatomy?”

Dean perked up. He may not be a doctor but he sure knew a lot about the human body after injuring himself so many times. He said so as well. Carlos looked a little relieved and a little dubious. “Well come help me. We need to check for scratches, broken bones; you know, the usual stuff.”

“Of course.” Dean replied, already taking of his jacket and rolling up his sleeves.

“So what are we? White crayons? Do we just stand here?” Gabriel asked, rather rudely.

“Of course not. Find us some food. Big Rico’s should be serving their special today. I heard it was italian sausage and chocolate drizzle. Mmmmmm tasty.” Cecil spoke up, his deep, baritone, radio voice soothing all the frayed nerves in the room.

Gabriel grinned and grabbed Castiel’s coat sleeve. Gabriel drug him to the door and a second more they were gone. Silence lasted for a while in the lab; both men studiously checking over Cecil’s body for any injuries. They found a couple of scrapes and a minor fracture in Cecil’s sixth toe on his left foot. As soon as they were done patching up the scapes, they helped Cecil sit up. “How you doing babe?” Carlos asked.

Cecil smiled. “I’ve definitely been better. Not as bad as when Strex took over or when Station Management tried to give me a birthday present so at least that’s some relief.”

Carlos laughed quietly at his husband and handed him the water bottle. “Here, drink. You need to hydrate.”

“Thank you my dear Carlos. Looking after me even when I probably just terrorized half the town.” Nevertheless, Cecil took the water bottle and drank it greedily.

Dean coughed awkwardly and asked where the bathroom was. It was obviously a private between Cecil and Carlos. He didn’t want to intrude. Also, the blatant love both of them had for each other sent a pang of hurt through Dean. He wanted that. He wanted to hold Castiel’s hand and reassure him that everything would be fine. But he couldn’t. Plus, he did actually have to use the bathroom. The diminishing adrenaline from the crazy day was wearing thin and his bladder was making itself known.

He hurried into the bathroom and quickly relieved himself. That’s when he noticed the little circle of stones by the sink. They were covered in blood and it looked pretty fresh. Dean couldn’t even bring himself to care. He was tired. He was wet from the rain and he wanted to  _ sleep _ . Through the thin bathroom wall (such a travesty, all bathroom walls should be thick) he could hear Carlos’s calming tones and Cecil’s worried and slightly frantic voice. It was soothing and Dean took a second to reflect. A second of reflection in a strange bathroom, in a strange lab, in a strange town.


	8. Pizza

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Gabriel is such a sap.

Gabriel and Cas walked to the pizza place next door. They entered and ordered a whole box of pizza to go. Which was strange because Big Rico was pretty sure no one ever ordered to go. But hey, what was he going to do? Not sell it to them? He walked to the back and started making them a ‘special menu’ pizza; one with red sauce, cheese, and a rare meat called pepperoni. 

Cas awkwardly looked around. There was a good number of patrons, many of them hurriedly eating their pizza to get their weekly slice over with. None of the pizza toppings seemed familiar but maybe different places had different customs. It certainly seemed that way. He looked away when a young woman looked his way and she had four eyes. It unsettled him, mostly because her pupils were bright red, not black. 

Gabriel was idly flipping through a menu; not really reading it but mostly using it just to keep his hands preoccupied. He was out of candy and therefore was bored. He noticed Cas staring at him. He sighed. It really sucked that Castiel’s memories had apparently been taken. Nothing from their life in heaven was with the dark haired angel and frankly, it just plain old sucked. He closed his eyes and began to remember.

* * *

_ “Castiel! Where are youuuu?” Gabriel sings, the bright light and untainted grounds of heaven all around him. _

_ A giggle erupts from behind a large oak, betraying Castiel position. Gabriel swoops in and pick up the small angel in an inescapable hold. “I found you Cassie!” _

_ “No fair! You didn’t give me enough time!” Castiel exclaims, pouting. _

_ Gabriel laughs at the small angel’s petulant look. Castiel is definitely a strange one but Gabriel loves him for it. “Cassie, you’ve said that the last twenty times we’ve played. Don’t be a sore loser. Here, look, I’ll play another game with you.” _

_ Castiel looks up in excitement. Castiel loves playing games, loves playing, loves everything. He is the ultimate stranger in heaven. Angels aren’t supposed to love; not in the way Castiel loves. He loves like a human. He loves the bright lights and wants to understand them. He loves bees and flowers and all the things, by God’s right, he  _ **_shouldn’t_ ** _ love. How ironic that God’s last warrior angel doesn’t want to fight at all. He wants to love.  _

_ As an archangel, Gabriel should stop him. Stomp out the flame of compassion before it’s too late. But he can’t. Castiel is too innocent and too pure. And also way too cute. Gabriel can’t do it. It would destroy him forever. So instead, he stokes the fire. Let’s Castiel play. Keeps Lucifer and Micheal away from him. Tries his best to keep Castiel out of the loop.  _

_ “Hmmm, let’s play…...tag!” Gabriel exclaims, tickling Castiel’s strange black feathers. _

_ Castiel squeals and wriggles out of Gabriel’s arms. He takes off, laughing, while spiraling high into the sky; his wings a dark blot against the white sky of heaven. _

_ Gabriel takes off nearly thirty seconds later, just enough of a head start to make it a little challenging. Castiel is a strong flier, even for someone so young. “I’m going to get youuuuu!” Gabriel sings, catching up fast. _

_ Castiel cries out in panic from being caught and starts to maneuver back down, hoping for Gabriel to shoot past him. Gabriel sees it coming but shoots past anyways, listening to the bright peals of laughter coming from the warrior angel. He turns to fly back down and that’s when he gets the message. The message that changes it all.  _

_ ‘Lucifer has been cast into hell. Dad is devastated. Come quick. Leave the abomination.’ Is all the message says but, it tears Gabriel apart.  _

_ Yeah, Luci wasn’t all that great but he was still his brother. And for Michael just to be that callous; something was seriously wrong. “Cassie!” Gabriel calls, his voice urgent. Castiel stops, “I have to go. I should be back soon and we can play some more then.” _

_ “Okay!” Castiel replies happily and waves a slightly pudgy arm just before Gabriel disappears. _

* * *

Gabriel remembers the rest. The hours of confusion and consolation of God. God loved Lucifer, he really did, but he did a shit job of showing it. Even when Lucifer had refused to love the humans that God created, God still tried to get him off easy. Leave him in Hell a couple of years and then bring him back. But Lucifer didn’t repent so God had to imprison him forever or until he ‘learned his lesson’. Like the ultimate time-out. The time afterwards was worse. God was distraught, his favourite and first son was pretty much disowning him. He started making stranger and stranger creatures to try to keep his mind of it. Those creatures ended up in Australia mostly. He started ignoring the angels and the humans. Gabriel was constantly helping running things along with the other archangels in place of God. They didn’t want the other angels to know. And since Gabriel was so busy, he couldn’t see Castiel. 

T hen, Gabriel had to leave. He couldn’t deal with the stress. Michael was honestly trying to keep things together but he couldn’t. Angels that were never meant to be more than messengers or helpers to the humans were starting to put in a play for power. Gabriel couldn’t stand it. But he didn’t want to leave his Cassie all alone so he pulled some favors and got some angels to look over him. Even if they didn’t want to. Apparently it did no good. Castiel remembered nothing of that time. He was battle hardened, heaven and world weary. And it broke Gabriel’s heart. 

“What?” Castiel asked, startling Gabriel out of his memories.

“Just thinking, Cassie. Don’t worry your pretty little head too much about it.” Gabriel replied flippantly. He smirked when Castiel squinted at him. Another memory hit him.

* * *

_ “Gabe, what this?” Castiel asks with a gasp. He is very young, only a couple hundred years old. Barely a toddler. _

_ “That, Cassie, is a fish. And you can’t step on it.” Gabriel scolds, just as Castiel tries to indeed, step on it. _

_ “Why not?” Castiel asks, tilting his head. _

_ “Big plans for that fish.” Gabriel replies, smiling at the fledgling. Castiel just squints. _

_ “What is fish?” Castiel asks, sitting down next to the archangel, letting his ink coloured wind flair out and rest on the ground.  _

_ Gabriel stares. No angel has dark wings. Sure, you have your darker shades. Some that are almost royal blue or some that are close to forest green but most angels are pastels or metal coloured. Black is unheard of. Or, if Gabriel has to say, Castiel’s wings are closer to midnight black but semantics. “A fish is a creature that God, our creator, my dad, sort of your dad, made. It lives in water and will eventually form something called man. Then, man will multiply and eventually create the Righteous Man.” Gabriel replies, patting Castiel’s head. _

_ Castiel’s eyes grow wide with wonder. “What righteous man?” _

_ Gabriel laughs and sighs with equal measure. Castiel is adorable but all his questions are tiring. _

* * *

“Here’s your pizza, Erika!” Big Rico said jovially, handing Gabriel a large box.

“For the last time my name is- Oh whatever. Thank you.” Gabriel replied, grabbing the box.

He walks towards the doors and Castiel silently follows. They walk the maybe ten steps to Carlos’s lab and open the door.

Carlos and Cecil are talking quietly and Dean is just coming out of the bathroom. “Oh cool. You got the grub. Smells great.” Dean says, walking forward and opening the box.

Gabriel had set it down on the table just seconds before. Dean grabs a slice and takes a bite. He groans. “Oh man. This is amazing.”

Carlos and Cecil stop talking and come over and grab a couple of slices too. Gabriel takes one because Big Rico really does make amazing pizza. Castiel doesn’t. “Yo, Cas. You’re not going to have any?” Dean asks, making puppy eyes at Castiel.

He probably doesn’t even realizing he’s doing it, Gabriel thinks amusedly. Dean really could be oblivious sometimes.

“I’m fine Dean.” Castiel responds but sits down next to the hunter anyways. Carlos begins to launch into a long winded explanation about what triggered Cecil that Gabriel ignores. 

The pizza is good, the company is mediocre, but at least he isn’t dying and he gets to observe Castiel. He’s changed so much from when he was a fledgling and Gabriel didn’t get to see any of it. The small angel with the bright laughter is no longer there and Gabriel wonders what made that angel disappear. More than that, Gabriel wonders how to bring that angel back.


	9. Making Plans

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cecil thinks a bit and also gets a tad more stranger.

Cecil observes the men in front of him. After his whole ‘thing’, Dean was more than a little wary which Cecil found fair. Castiel looked mostly okay, his face not really betraying any emotions. Cecil concerned himself with trying to figure out the non-angel’s tells. Cecil was very good at figuring out tells; he even had a badge from when he was a scout. Castiel mostly sat stiffly beside Dean while Dean ate the pizza with gusto. Occasionally he would squint when one of the others spoke, probably in confusion. It seemed Castiel didn’t understand a lot of things while also simultaneously knowing too much. 

Such a strange combo. And the Eri-sorry, GABRIEL was very telling. His mocking and teasing words held no real intent to harm and his exuberant, theatrical behaviour seemed to be covering something else up. Not that Cecil could tell what, he wasn’t  _ that _ good after all. It was still strange and interesting however. And Cecil liked things that were interesting. He was a radio host and that meant he was first a journalist. And that meant he was nosy. Which in turn meant he was good at getting information. 

Uncovering stories, exposing lies, the radio business.  That’s what Cecil did, had done for the past….however many years. He found it fun most days and other days reassuring. He had his clairvoyant powers and radio was the only way he found it manageable. ‘Don’t interfere.’ his mother always said. ‘You’ll ruin it all. You’ll be killed.’ She would continue. ‘And stay away from mirrors.’ She would add before drifting off somewhere else.

Cecil would never not listen to his mother and to this day he shied away from all mirrors and interfere unless he couldn’t help himself. Which reminded him.

“Dean!” He asked excitedly.

The man looked up, pizza in hand. “What?”

“Did you find your brother? I know you were looking for him earlier and now that the whole problem with me is over we can start a search for him! We can go ask the Erikas!” Cecil beamed, trying to ease the man with his helpfulness.

“Well...um...thanks for the offer Cecil but well, see, we already asked the Erikas and they led us to Gabriel here. And he told us that Sammy is fine so it’s much less urgent now.” Dean said awkwardly. Cecil’s face fell.

Darn, now he just isn’t helpful at all.

“Well, I still would like to find Sammy. You could maybe help us with that?” Dean asked, gesturing vaguely in Cecil’s direction. 

Cecil lit up. Unfortunately literally. “Oh crap. I’m so so sorry. Gosh, this hasn’t happened in a while. I thought I was over this. Doctors are such liars. Just take this pill and the cold will be gone. But look at me now. Still glowing. And I’m all out of pills. Oh it should go down soon don’t worry. I would love to help by the way.”

“You might be very beneficial to us. Carlos said you know everything that goes on in the town?” Castiel asked, this time squinting his eyes against the glare of Cecil’s skin.

“Well I really don’t know that much. I told you Carlos, I’m only vaguely clairvoyant. It’s not going to help us here. Our best bet is to go to Mayor Cardinal. We’re friends. She’ll help us out. I would announce it on the radio but I’m afraid Station Management is going to pretty mad at me for the next couple of days.”

The group agreed and quickly finished off the rest of the pizza. Cecil noted that Castiel and Gabriel only ate a piece together while Dean ate around five pieces and Carlos at two. Cecil didn’t eat any pepperoni pizza. Doesn’t really like pepperoni. Doesn’t really like eating meat in general. Reminded him too much of city council mandated holidays like Thanksgiving and Independence From Our Giant Worm Overlord Day.

They all gather themselves and headed out to the city hall. The sky has returned to a fairly normal colour and the rest of the town had once again braved the outdoors. Many of them kept their distance but some of the hooded figures actually came quite close, choosing to brush along Dean’s arm or casually reach a hand out to pat his head. It was both hilarious and frightening. Hooded figures didn’t touch many things besides pizza.

They got to city hall and quietly went inside. It was a place of government after all. You shouldn’t disrupt government chants and meetings  with loudness. Even a child knew that. The group moved forward and eventually found an unpreoccupied press member. “Hello, we’re here to see Mayor Cardinal.” Cecil said pleasantly, throwing his voice so it sounded closer to his radio voice.

“She’s busy.” The press member said without even glancing at the group.

“Please, Carlos and I need to talk to her about what happened earlier and these gentlemen are here with us as guests.” Cecil tried again. The press member looked up in annoyance. “Look man- oh Cecil! I didn’t realize it was you. You can go right ahead. Sorry for making you stop.” The poor man practically quaked in his shoes before hastily moving away from them.

“Wow, you’re like some kind of scary celebrity. Bit like Kanye but also like Bruce Wayne. That guy seemed terrified and awed of you.” Dean said, whistling while they moved farther along.

“I don’t want to talk about it. I don’t really enjoy other people’s fear.” Cecil said sharply as they stopped in front of large, obsidian, double doors. Cecil raised a hand, knocked three times and let out a howl.

The doors creaked open while a wisp of wind swirled by with a whispered ‘come in’.


	10. The Broadcast of the Century

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cecil cusses and there's some fun facts about the human body.

“Hello listeners. Let me tell you, Khoshekh has been extremely cute lately. Sooooo very cute. The other day, they licked me! Sure, it kind of stung and my finger sort of disintegrated but their little purple tongue was probably the cutest thing I’ve ever seen,” Cecil cooed into the microphone. “Now listeners I’m not going to lie to you except for what I have to lie to you about. Which, thinking about it, is quite a lot but nevertheless I’m not going to lie to you about this.” 

Cecil drew a breath and looked behind him. Carlos smiled encouragingly and Dean gave a nice thumbs up. “Listeners, three entities are missing. Two are Erikas while one is a human, as far as we know. The human, we’ll just call him Sam, went missing-what was it?- a while back from his home-bunker-whatever but was found to be residing here in our little town of Night Vale. Sadly, he has gone missing again but the City Council and the Secret Police both swear they did not ‘dispose’ of him. The two Erikas went searching for Sam but they went missing as well. The Erikas, we’ll call one Gabriel and the other Carlos 2.0, are both rather clever and  _ probably _ aren’t dead. Don’t look at me like that Dean. There’s always a chance that they-”

There’s a crash, the sound of muffled cursing followed by a low growl. Many of the Night Vale population tilts their head, or heads we don’t judge, in confusion. It’s not often that there’s cursing on the show but many welcome the change giddily. Not many get to hear cussing since it was banned about two years ago by Station Management. Cecil comes back on air.

“Sorry about that listeners. I’m having some...technical issues. Damn it Carlos keep him back, I’m trying to be professional for fuck sakes.” A growl comes again. “Right, sorry Station Management! Listeners, you’ll have to excuse me for the problems that may occur during the broadcast. A man, we’ll call him Gay, is very anxious to find Sam, Gabriel, and Carlos 2.0. He is the brother of Sam and a close friend of Carlos 2.0. Oh! I would like to point out that Carlos 2.0 does  _ not _ look anything like my precious Carlos but is instead roughly 6 feet tall and has black hair with blue eyes. You’ll understand why he’s Carlos 2.0 when you find him. And oh, do I have all the faith that you will find them. Dear listeners, you are what holds the town together;  _ you _ are the reason this town, this broadcast continues, so I know you will help us during this time and hopefully none of you will die a painful death. Now, it is time for CHILDREN'S FUN FACT SCIENCE CORNER” Cecil hastily yells into the microphone which cuts to static before starting the prerecorded message. 

_ “The average human body carries ten times more bacteria cells than human cells. Isn’t that just interesting! However, what count as an average human body? Does it mean you have to have five fingers on each hand and five toes on each foot? What counts as non average? Your personality? You lifestyle? Whether or not you might be a five-headed dragon trying to run for mayor? What make you or I human if our body is made more of bacteria than human? Who came up with the name human? Who came up with language? Reflect on this while you prepare for another sleepless night. This has been Children’s Fun Fact Science Corner.” _

More static. “-hear me? Hey, everyone. My name is Dean not Gay and I really need some help finding these missing people, kay. Cecil’s gone right now and Carlos has no clue how to work the microphone so I messed with some buttons and I think it working. Carlos?”

Carlos looks up from behind the desk with a pen in his mouth and two strange wires in his hands. “Yeah you’re fine. Here, hand it to me.” Some rustling. “Hello Night Vale. Sorry Cecil can continue to broadcast. He’s a bit busy right now trying to calm down Station Management. Scientifically speaking, I’m not sure if they can be calmed down but I’m leaving it to Cecil to try. Now, I’ve gotten some texts from a few concerned people so let me give you some more facts. Gabriel has been seen around town for the past couple of months so I’m sure you’ll remember who I’m talking about when I say this next part. Candy store mayhem. Okay so everyone remembers? Alright we’re looking for that guy and the dark haired one. Sam should be with them but Sam is about 6’4 with longer brown hair. Gabriel and...Carlos 2.0-really Cecil- were last seen around the Ralph’s. We are not sure where they went afterwards but that was only yesterday that they went missing. They shouldn’t be too dehydrated because I gave them water bottles before they left. Call either Cecil or myself if you need anymore information.”

The broadcast suddenly shuts off. Citizens eye each other warily. What’s going on with this broadcast? So many interruptions and not one deadly happening. Just as they each individually but somehow still in unison make a plan to go to the station, the broadcast comes back on air.

“Sorry again lovely listeners. Ooh I should use that more. So now Dean is missing and for a second I thought Carlos was missing but he was just in the bathroom. I guess I’ll have to describe Dean to you all as well. Well, Dean is pretty tall too with kind of blondish brown hair and his eyes are fanfiction green. What? No, that was a perfect description of him Carlos. Dean also wears a lot of plaid. Hope we find them all soon!” Cecil then manages to make emoji faces through sound alone and finishes the broadcast. 

The town is confused. Station Management is confused. City Council is confused. Dean is confused, he isn’t in Night Vale at all anymore.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry for not posting regularly. It's a real problem I have.


	11. The Broadcast of the Century

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dean just wanted to find his brother dammit and now look at him!

Dean looked around the deserted, desert area he's in. There's some buildings but they all look long abandoned. "Cas! Gabriel! Sammy!" He shouted to no reply. He figured that whatever brought him here also brought Cas, Gabriel, and Sam. Unfortunately, Dean was wrong. Castiel and Gabriel were not brought here. As for Sammy… well even the author can’t tell you that. 

Dean didn’t wait around for something to come and attack him; no, his years of hunting and being hunted honed his skills that he knew just what to do. Or that’s at least what he told himself, nothing had prepared him for what he had just gone through but life rarely wants you to be prepared. Dean moved swiftly into the nearest, safest-looking building. When he gets inside, the interior is clean, neat, and devoid of any decorations at all. So not abandoned but cleared out and then abandoned. Strange. 

Dean searched the building top to bottom anyways looking for anything that might be of any use. All he found was some dust, a dead rat, and an old faded poster of a smiling god. Nothing he could use. He moved on and moved on and moved on until he reached the end of the first row of buildings. Every building had yielded the same things: some dust, a dead rat, and an old faded poster of a smiling god. 

It was unnerving to say the least and Dean was quickly growing worried. He had no provisions, the buildings were almost all identical, and every, single one of the group was getting pulled apart. It was the strategy a talented killer would use if they knew they couldn’t win against a group. Dean realized this with a jolt and narrowed his eyes. He didn’t like being hunted, especially by something when he didn’t even know what it was.

He abandoned his original plan of searching the rest of the buildings and quickly tried to find the nearest route that would take him out of the ghost town and back to Night Vale. He did find a road, the only paved one in the immediate area and decided it was his best bet since all of Night Vale’s roads were paved.

* * *

 

After nearly an hour of walking, Dean noticed that he was in the middle of nowhere and nothing was changing. He knew he was walking forward, that the road continued to stretch into the horizon in a straight line and that if he looked behind him, he could see the fuzzy shape of the buildings behind him. What he didn’t understand was that the area around him wasn’t changing. The rocks and occasional small plant were the same spacing and size that they were a hundred yards back and had been for half a mile. “For fucks sake! I’m trying to get back to Night Vale, not die in the middle of the desert!” Dean angrily yelled at the sky. The sky did not yell back.

Dean kicked a rock and started to angrily continue walking down the road. As he walked, he noticed a small hole in the ground off to the right. He decided that at least it was something new in the landscape so he should check it out. He carefully made his way to the area, the ground was rocky after all, and peered in. A small  _ thing _ peered back. It looked harmless enough and Dean leaned a little closer; unfortunately, this was a mistake because as we all know  _ things _ are to be approached with caution especially if they look harmless. It swiped a paw at Dean’s nose and managed to cut Dean’s face.

Dean hopped back with a curse and glared at the creature. It stared back smugly, and started to climb out of the hole.  _ Hello _ . It impressed upon Dean. “What the fuck?” Dean exclaimed.

_ I said hello.  _ It replied back, raising a paw to lick delicately at.  _ It’s rather rude to cuss at a creature such as me, didn’t your parents teach you anything? _

“I don’t even know what you are.” Dean continued to glare at the creature.

_ Rude.  _ Was all it replied before sauntering off towards the road.

“Wait, where are you going?” Dean called. He didn’t like the creature but at least it might be able to tell him something..

_ To Night Vale, of course.  _ It responded with a tilt of its head.  _ That is where you want to go, isn’t it? I must confess it has been a while since I’ve talked to humans such as you but it was pretty clear you want to find your lover and your brother. _

“He-he’s not my lover but yes, I want to go back to Night Vale.” Dean responded, cheeks flaming.

_ Well then follow me.  _ It replied.  _ The name’s Rob by the way. _

“Rob? Really?” Dean said, finally back on the road.

_ It’s not my ACTUAL name but it’s a shortened version of it. I like it.  _ Rob replied haughtily.

“Whatever, just get me back.”

_ It’ll take a while.  _ A pause.  _ Well, only about an hour your time but in Night Vale time, it’ll be about a week, give or take. _

“A week! But, I’ve already been walking an hour!” Dean exclaimed, stopping and staring.

Rob turned around,  _ Well then, you’ve been gone already for a week. Sucks for you but, you’re gonna be almost three if we don’t get moving. _

With that declaration, Rob turned back around and started down the road once again. Grumbling, Dean followed. The sun burned overhead and not even the wind blew as the two made their way.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am soooo sorry about the really sporadic updates. I'm taking a full semester of college while also still in high school so my work load is insane.
> 
> Also what kind of creature is Rob? Nobody knows. He does have cat paws if that helps.


End file.
